Kindness-to-Go. Relational, Connective.

Kindness-to-Go: Relational and Connective.

Kindness-to-Go: Relational and Connective.

Kindness-to-Go encourages outward-focused-ness to flow from a congregation, a seminar or a conference.

Description of kindness:—noun

1. the state or quality of being kind.


2. a kind act.


3. favor: his many kindnesses to me.


4. kind behavior: I will never forget your kindness.


5. friendly feeling; liking.

Kindness-to-Go Outcomes: 
Small simple acts of kindness bring the giver and the receiver of the act of kindness into a relationally connective experience.

Len Sweet uses this communication filter E.P.I.C. to encourage leaders to develop sensory elements (see, taste, smell, hear and feel) when communicating with not-yet-believers.

EPIC Filter/Grid: Experiential, Participatory, Image-Based and Connective.
Kindness-to-go incorporates all of the filters.

I ask the question before every outreach,”Does this outreach contain E.P.I.C. components?

  • Experiential: Is there a positive experience exchanged? 
Yes, the giver experiences an emotional, spiritual lift when giving or serving someone. The person receiving the small gift or an act of service experiences kindness and love.

The experience is heightened by adding a prayer component. Praying with a person is both a spiritual and an emotional experience for the person praying and the person receiving prayer.

A kind act, done with great love, enables both the giver and the receiver to experience a positive touch of God’s love.

If the kindness is an offered drink or food, the receiver receives the gift, and experiences the pleasure of eating and/or drinking. This reinforces the positive experience in the memory/feeling part of a persons being.
A relational experience also flows through a positive personal conversation and connection.

  • Participatory: Are the giver and receiver participating? 
Yes, the giver gathers, serves and gives; the receiver receives the gift or the act of service. Dialogue, encouragement and grace touches both the giver and receiver.

  • Image-Based: Is there a positive image connected to the small gift or act of service?
 Yes, the image may be an item: a connect card, a cup of coffee, a bottle of water, a gift bag, a granola bar etc. The caring serving person is also part of the positive image.

The image seeing someone serving another human with no strings attached is powerful. The kind acts often remain embedded within a person’s memory.

Definition of kindness: kind behavior: I will never forget your kindness.

  • Connective: Is there a positive connective act that relationally connects the heart to the giver and the receiver?
 Yes, the positive connection intensifies as conversation develop and authentic love flows.

Small things done with great love will change the world. Sjogren.

Good deeds create good will that opens hearts to the Good News. Rusaw

There is also a spiritual dimension of an intentional act of kindness.
When we join Heaven’s kind intention toward the people the Father loves, the Holy Spirit bears witness to our kind acts/good deeds.

A spiritual seed is placed within the heart of those serving and those receiving.*see article at the end.

(See Ephesians 1 NASB and Titus 3 NASB.)

  • Kindness-to-Go Practice / Experience:

People quickly pick up items to be shared with others after a church service, a conference session, or a seminar.

They read or listen to simple instructions.

They then go and do.

Example Gift Bags:


People pick up gift bags and go.
They give the bag and the connect-card as a positive intentional act of kindness to restaurant workers, servers at drive-thru eateries, grocery store check out people. Some take the gift bags to hospitals, or to their work, or to an office where they are relationally known. i.e. Their doctors office. etc.


Why Acts of Kindness Matter to Your Wellbeing

Article below by Sandra Ciminelli; Cred. Dip.Couns.(Chris6an) Sources: David R Hamilton, PhD., ‘The Five Side Effects of Kindness‘ (Hay House,
February 2017).Random Acts Of Kindness/The Science of Kindness

Making others feel good through an act of kindness can be really rewarding by making us feel great about our actions for doing the right thing. Practicing kindness also has a profound effect our own mental & physiological health, helping us to become happier and compassionate towards others. Being kind to others has been known to help boost our own immune system, slow down aging, elevate our self esteem and improve blood pressure.

Both practicing and witnessing acts of kindness can help reduce blood pressure by producing oxytocin, known as the ‘love hormone.’ Oxytocin causes the release of nitric acid in the blood vessels which effectively expands the blood vessels thus reducing blood pressure.’ Self-esteem, a better outlook on life (optimism) and a healthy heart are said to be the benefits of kindness. But it doesn’t stop there. Kindness has a positive effect on others that spreads.

Kindness is Contagious

Experiencing an act of kindness can improve our mood, it can make our day and increase the likelihood of spreading kindness to others.

Exercise / Practice Kindness
“It’s kind of like weight training, we found that people can actually build up their compassion ‘muscle’ and respond to others’ suffering with care and a desire to help.” Dr. Ritchie Davidson, University of Wisconsin.

You can’t win a person over with hatred or indifference
“Kindness makes a person attractive. If you could win the world, melt it, do not hammer it.”  Alexander McClaren

HERE IS A LIST ON THE POSITIVE EFFECTS OF KINDNESS ON OUR MENTAL HEALTH
Pain – kindness releases endorphins in the brain. It’s a natural painkiller.
Stress – kind people age slower and have lower stress than the average person.
Anxiety & Depression – kindness improves mood, depression and anxiety. Kindness stimulates the production of serotonin which heals wounds, calms and increases happiness.
Blood Pressure – kindness helps release oxytocin, a ‘cardio protective’ hormone that releases another chemical called ‘nitric oxide in the body that dilates blood vessel, thus reducing blood pressure.
Pleasure – elevated levels of dopamine in the brain causes pleasure/reward centers to light up. This is known as the ‘helpers high.’
Self-Worth – kindness can make us not just feel good about ourselves, but begin to believe in ourselves, increasing our self-worth.
Relationships – kindness helps improve relationships by reducing the distance between individuals.

God wants us to be kind to one another, be good Samaritans and help the less fortunate.
God in his infinite wisdom, love and kindness presented mankind with salvation. The ultimate act of kindness was the death of Jesus Christ giving himself up for us. Not because of our own righteousness but by the
mercy of God.

The kind intention of his will.” Eph. 1

When the Kindness of God appeared…” Titus 3:4-5 “Be kind to one
another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:32

Sandra Ciminelli; Cred. Dip.Couns.(Chris6an) Sources: David R Hamilton, PhD., ‘The Five Side Effects of Kindness‘ (Hay House,
February 2017).Random Acts Of Kindness/The Science of Kindness

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